Great Expectations: Chivalry In Tomorrow's Knights

Many people today lament society’s seeming lack of chivalry — especially in the “younger generation,” the 21-and-under set. They declare that “kids these days” have no sense of courtesy and respect, and are simply focused on themselves. These critics often seek to place the blame on a variety of sources — the Internet, feminism, reality TV, video games, or public education, just to name a few — for eroding the sense of chivalry and good manners that were once widespread in society.
There was a scene I witnessed in a local restaurant just the other day that depicted this sort of thing to a tee. The restaurant wasn’t a fine-dining establishment — it was one of those places where you order at the counter, then go pick up your meal on a tray when the attendant calls your name.
The scene in the restaurant was this: A family of five had come in for lunch. There was mom and dad, two children (middle school-age brother and a sister a year or two younger), and grandmother. They placed their order, then sat down at a table to wait. The adults carried on a conversation while the kids whipped out their high-tech gadgets — a video game for the boy, a text-messaging mobile phone for the girl.
Then, when the food came out, the kids sat playing with their electronic devices, while dad and grandma went to fetch the trays, along with all the necessary condiments and utensils. The children watched grandma (who was walking with a cane) carry their food to the table before she returned to the counter and picked up her own lunch. By the time grandma and dad sat down, the kids were already half-way through their meal.
“A perfect example of the lack of chivalry today!” you might say to yourself. Yes … but perhaps not in the way you might think.
Because the real chivalry-offenders in this tableau were not the two adolescents, but rather, the adults. In a situation like this, it is dad’s duty and responsibility (and mom’s as well) to become the “chivalry coach,” to lean over and discretely tell the young folks what’s expected of them. Learning to be of service is part of the education of adolescence — that transition from childhood to adult status. Recognizing that the responsibilities of duty and courtesy are part-and-parcel with the pleasures of liberty and privilege (such as, for example, having your own high-tech games and texting gadgets) is part of the rite of passage of a young man or woman into the modern “order of chivalry.”
The Spanish knight and author Ramon Llull, in his 13th century manuscript The Book of Knighthood and of Chivalry, recognized the duty a knight has in “passing of the torch” of the values of chivalry. He knew that a deliberate effort had to be made on the part of the knights of one generation to inculcate the values of chivalry into the next.
Llull said: “Every man who would come to knighthood should learn, in his youth, to carve at table, to serve, to arm and to attend a knight. The sons of knights must be instructed in the ways of chivalry, just carpenters must learn to hew, and clerks must learn the science of study. If a knight does not learn the ways of chivalry in youth, he will never learn them in his old age.”
One of the more noble aspects of human nature is that the more that’s expected of us, the more we tend to rise to meet those expectations. Tolerate discourtesy and inattentiveness, and you may find that that’s exactly what you get. But if you challenge your children to be thoughtful, compassionate and respectful of other’s needs, they’ll surely take up the gauntlet with pride. Passing the values and customs of chivalry to tomorrow’s generation is part of the duty of today’s knights in shining armor.

Knight vs. Pirate

A new show called “Deadliest Warrior” has debuted recently on cable TV with an intriguing premise. The show proposes a weekly match-up between warriors from two different cultures and time periods (with the help of some modern forensic investigation and computer simulation) to see which will prove more effective in battle.
Ironically, one of the upcoming episodes of the show promises a “knight vs. pirate” encounter. As colorful and exciting as such a duel may sound, the concept has taken on a new sense of relevance in light of events in the news recently — events that give us a real look into the meaning of chivalry and the dynamic of “knight vs. pirate.”
In recent days, international attention has been focused on a drama that took place in the Indian Ocean near the Horn of Africa. There, a group of modern-day pirates from Somalia attempted to seize a container ship carrying food aid to needy countries in Africa, including Somalia itself. During the attempted takeover of the ship, the captain, Richard Phillips, turned himself over to the pirates in order to ensure the safety of his crew. Capt. Phillips was held for ransom under threat of execution for several tense days until the U.S. military intervened to secure his rescue and deliver the ship and its humanitarian cargo to its destination.
Capt. Phillips has been hailed by his crew, his family, the media and the public at large as a true hero, and rightfully so. And (without any intent to diminish his heroism) he is only one of several such heroes that have come to the attention of the public lately — ordinary men and women of extraordinary courage who have stood up, put themselves in harm’s way, done the right thing and acted with bravery and compassion in the face of danger and panic.
The number of stories that have been popping up in the media — from people who put themselves at risk in moments of crisis to rescue others, to those who simply dedicate themselves to work for charitable causes despite their own economic hardships — indicate that, far from being forgotten, the concept of chivalry lives on, and is valued and respected in today’s world.
The buccaneers of the 18th and 19th centuries provide colorful characters for exciting high-sea adventures, from the novels of Robert Lewis Stevenson to the “Pirates of the Caribbean” movies — but when danger lurks or duty calls, a pirate is a poor role model (romantic notions of “noble pirates” from Gilbert and Sullivan notwithstanding).
We all hope that, when faced with danger and violence, we would act with the grace and courage of a Capt. Phillips, rather than the conniving self-interest of oceangoing thieves hijacking food and medicine meant to ease the suffering of their neighbors. We hope that in a crisis we would reach out to help others, rather than threatening someone else to save our own skins. We would all hope that when faced with hardship or adversity, we would react with the valor and chivalry of a knight, rather than the selfishness and greed of a pirate.
In a real contest between a pirate and a knight in shining armor, there’s no doubt about who comes out the winner.

Up On Our Podcasts?

Don't miss Episode 30 of our podcast, which was just posted:
Reclaiming the Code of the Sword
This episode features an interview with Daniel McNicoll, director of the new documentary Reclaiming The Blade, which looks at the growing fascination today with all things sword related - from movies and video games, to the growing field of Western martial arts. We'll consider the symbolism of swords and chivalry among today's heroes.
Plus: Who picks up the bill? A discussion of the "old fashioned" custom that a gentleman always pays the bill when taking a lady out to dinner? Can a gentleman let a lady pay for dinner and still be a knight in shining armor?
And - A conversation about the Islamic roots of chivalry with author, poet and activist Charles Upton.

Summer Is Knight Time

Summer is just around the corner (again???), and once again I'm pleased to be working with the San Diego City/County Library System to be part of the 2009 Summer Reading Program. This summer, the theme will be something that every kid loves: Catapults!
We're going to start with a "virtual" tour of a real medieval castle - kids will get to see what a castle looks like, see the view from the ramparts, and understand the defensive function of such a fortress. Then, they'll see a few catapults in action as I demonstrate the mechanical principles of a few model siege engines - a true catapult, as well as an onager and a trebuchet too! Best of all, the kids in attendance will get to build their own mini-catapult (out of craft sticks) to take home with them. I'll give the kids a few soft balls to use as safe ammo. Will the kids use these "war machines" to shoot more dangerous ammo - peanuts, coins, pebbles - when they get home? Well parents, that's up to you!
How does this relate to the code of chivalry? You ask. We'll also take a bit of time to talk about some of the "rules of war" a knight would have been expected to observe when using a siege engine like a catapult. Once a machine like this was brought to bear, a knight was expected to give the enemy a chance to surrender honorably before he started bombarding the castle. Additionally, an honorable knight would have allowed the noncombatatants (merchants and servants living in the castle) a chance to evacuate before an attack. It's important to understand that even in war, there is a sense of honor and restraint that is part of the code of chivalry.
Interested in bringing our "create a catapult" presentation to your library or school? Just visit the Chivalry Today website for more information, or to contact us to add us to your schedule.